[Note: Please know I am not making fun of Michael Jackson, here. I am, however, making fun of Wikipedia. In a big way.]

In following the death of Michael Jackson, I found myself reading on Wikipedia some of the films he made to coincide with the promotion of Bad, the 3D flick for Disneyland, Captain Eo, and Moonwalker. Eo seemed straight forward enough, but the Wiki description for Moonwalker resembles out-takes from Trainspotting combined with the type of dreams I had when I was 8 and had a very high fever.

An excerpt:

” … The film then backtracks to Jackson playing in a field with the children and their dog. The dog runs away, and in their search for it, Jackson and the children uncover the lair of Mr. Big, Frankie Lideo (Joe Pesci), a drug dealing mobster with an army of henchmen who wants to get the entire populace of planet earth addicted to drugs, starting with the children. Mr. Big discovers Jackson and the children, but they escape; Jackson tells the children to meet him at Club 30’s [sic], which turns out to be a haunted nightclub abandoned since the 1930s. The story goes back to the mobsters attack on Jackson, and here it is revealed that Jackson is actually a magical gangster, who draws his power from shooting stars. As one passes by the club, Jackson transforms into a sportscar and mows down several of Mr. Big’s henchmen. The story picks up on the children at Club 30’s, and at first the children are afraid, but when Jackson appears the scary atmosphere of the club transforms and the children find themselves back in the 1930s. The club is now filled with zoot suiters and swing dancers. Jackson participates in a dance-off with the other club members. …”